A guy was known among his friends to be very brief and
to the point -
he really
never said too much. One day, a saleswoman promoting
Avon knocked on
his door
and asked to see his wife, so the guy told her that
she wasn't home.
“Well,” the
woman said, “could I please wait for her?” The man
directed her to the
drawing
room and left her there for more than three ساعة.
After feeling really
worried,
she called out for him and asked, “May I ask where
your wife is?” “She
went to
the cemetery,” he replied. “And when is she coming
back?” “I don't
really know,”
he said. “She's been there eleven years now!”
**************************************************
**
A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were
celebrating their 40th
wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy
came to them
and said that because they had been such a devoted
couple she would
grant each of them a very special wish.
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her
husband. Whoosh!
Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her
hands. The man
wished for a female companion 30 years younger...
Whoosh...immediately
he turned ninety!!! Gotta love that fairy!
-------------------
An old man walks into a bar, sits down, and starts
crying.
The bartender asks, “What’s wrong?” The old man looks
at the bartender through
Teary eyes and between sobs says, “I married a
beautiful woman two days ago. She’s a natural blonde,
twenty-five, intelligent, a marvelous cook, a
meticulous housekeeper,
Extremely sensitive to my wants and needs, very
giving, my best friend, and intensely passionate in
bed.”
The bartender stares at the old man for a brief moment
and says, “But that sounds great! You have what every
man wants in a woman, so why are crying?”
The old man looks at the bartender and says, “I can’t
remember where I live!”
-------------------------
Husband(returning late from work): Good evening dear,
I’m logged
Wife: Have u brought the groceries?
Husband: Bad Command or file name.
Wife: But I told u in the morning.
Husband: syntax error. Abort?
Wife: what about my new T.V?
Husband: Variable not found.
Wife: At least, give me your credit card; I want to do
some
shopping.
Husband: sharing violation, access denied.
Wife: Do u love me or do u love computers or are u
just being
funny.
Husband: Too many parameters.
Wife: It was a great mistake that I married an idiot
like u.
Husband: Type mismatch.
Wife: U r useless.
Husband: It’s by default.
Wife: Wt about your salary.
Husband: file in use…try later.
Wife: Wt is my value in this family.
Husband: Unknown virus
تعليق