here you are ......




One night at the dinner table, the wife commented,
"When we were first married, you took the small piece of steak and gave me
the larger.
Now you take the large one and leave me the smaller; You don't love me any
more..."
"Nonsense, darling," replied the husband, "you just cook better now."
. . ..

*
*
I don’t know what to do,” a man told a therapist. “My wife thinks she’s a
piano.”
“Well, then, bring her in for an appointment.”
“Are you mad?” exclaimed the husband. “Do you know how much it costs to move
a piano?”

*
*
This guy is walking with his friend. He says to this friend, "I'm a walking
economy."
His friend replies, "How so?"
"My hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and both
of these together are putting me into a deep depression.

*
*
An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally
asked him, "How do you expect to get into Heaven?"
The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll run in and out and in and out
and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake, Dylan,
come in or stay out!'

*
*
An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has
been living with for the last 40 years.
The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that
were used to put the curse on you."
The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."

*
*







layali alshoug..